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You're in line...

Discussion in 'The Humor Mill' started by Utsane, Dec 5, 2019.

0/5, 0 votes
  1. Utsane

    Utsane Groundskeeper DLP Supporter

    Messages:
    330
    Dec 5, 2019 #1
    The last starship is about to leave a dying Earth. There's only one spot left, and several million people stand ahead of you on the waitlist to get on.

    What niche do you claim only you can fill to clinch the spot, and survive the destruction of your home planet? Which of your unique skills do you depend on on when calamity strikes?
     
  2. Galen

    Galen DA Member

    Messages:
    159
    Dec 5, 2019 #2
    I can close out a tab that has the words “pls vot fore pairing!!!” at a world record speed.

    Also, I can sew a mean turtleneck
     
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2019
  3. Arthellion

    Arthellion Lord of the Banned ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Messages:
    1,438
    Location:
    Georgia, USA
    High Score:
    4400
    Dec 5, 2019 #3
    I am Lord of the Banned. I ban anyone else from being able to get on the ship.

    I ban enough people from the ship so my family and all of you are able to get on the ship.

    We ride off into the stars.
     
    Quiddity, H_A_Greene, ScottPress, Utsane
  4. Zombie

    Zombie Black Philip Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐

    Messages:
    6,036
    Dec 5, 2019 #4
    I give my place in line to someone else because I'm not afraid to die. More specifically, I'd go back home if it was in tact, smoke a big fatty, and watch the sunrise/die/etc
     
    Zilly Sawdust, Oz, FitzDizzyspells, H_A_Greene, Agayek, Arthellion
  5. KHAAAAAAAN!!

    KHAAAAAAAN!! Troll in the Dungeon –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

    Messages:
    1,159
    Location:
    Under your bed.
    High Score:
    4,507
    Dec 9, 2019 #5
    I can....


    Well, shit.
     
    Oz
  6. Teyrn

    Teyrn Order Member

    Messages:
    875
    Location:
    Frozen North
    Dec 9, 2019 #6
    Fuck that. I die on Earth.
     
  7. Cjonbloodletter

    Cjonbloodletter Professor

    Messages:
    472
    Location:
    In Lord Jabu Jabu
    Dec 9, 2019 #7
    I can make everyone else on the ship feel better about themselves, "at least I'm not that guy".
     
    Utsane, Agent
  8. Selethe

    Selethe normalphobe ⭐

    Messages:
    562
    Location:
    Maryland
    Dec 9, 2019 #8
    e-girl
     
    Utsane, H_A_Greene, Oz
  9. sonder

    sonder Professor

    Messages:
    486
    Location:
    USA
    Dec 9, 2019 #9
    I don’t deserve it any more than the next bloke in line. That’s kind of the magic of me, isn’t it? Nothing makes me special. You need one of those on a ship full of specialized people.

    That said, I’m not afraid to die. I’ve asked Death many time and he always told me not yet. The next time I see him, we will embrace like old friends.
     
  10. Andrela

    Andrela Plot Bunny DLP Supporter

    Messages:
    5,048
    Location:
    Silesia
    Dec 12, 2019 #10
    I do excellent blowjobs.